Emerge! Tunneling Out of Life's Trials

Fall down seven times, get up eight.

Japanese proverb

 

            It was one of those phone calls that are forever date-stamped in your mind.

            December 8, 2006 at about 4:00 p.m.

            I’m leaving a gas station near my home and my cell phone rings. It’s my mother. She rarely calls my cell phone so I’m a little alarmed.

            “Am’s house burned down,” she says. “I have the kids in the car with me and they’re crying. Thank God nobody was hurt. They weren’t at home when it happened.”

            Shock settles in.

            This is my youngest brother’s (nickname Am) brand new home. His family had been in there for less than six months. Everyone had gotten up that morning and gone off to work or school. My brother received a call from the fire department around 2:00 p.m. There’s been a fire at your house – it’s a bad one.

            The devastation of coming home and seeing the residence they left intact earlier in the day—with a car still parked in the garage—smoldering from the flames, took an infernal like toll on them. Just thinking about what this experience would be like paints an awful picture for anyone.

            How do you move past that surreal visual?  

            The family literally had only the clothes on their backs. No toothbrushes, valuables destroyed. Family documents, memorabilia, photographs—all gone. They continued to go through the dark holes of necessary and inevitable motions and emotions.

            Is there a path out of this smoky trap?

            An outpouring of support from family, neighbors, friends and church members made its way to them. Money, gift cards and clothing helped them meet immediate needs. Lots of prayers and words of encouragement held them up as they dealt with this plight.

            The next steps were finding a temporary place to stay, dealing with the insurance company and a host of other unpleasant tasks. The emotional needs of the family were a continuous priority for all of us. Comforting conversations with my nieces, brother and sister-in-law were difficult, but necessary. They continued to muddle through—looking for signs that things would soon normalize. Within six months an intact foundation, in spite of the fire, allowed the house to be rebuilt. They made some modifications from the old design that were actually better for some aspects of their family life. In time, they came out of this ordeal tested but with a testimony.

            Trials engulf our sense of security—temporarily. "Trouble don't last always" one of my favorite gospel songs goes. Decisive and strategic digging is what's needed to get us through combustible tunnels with these troubles on every side. Let’s get up and put out the energy to overcome, staring at our trials with a fiery focus.

            Emerging from dark passages with our flashlights, let’s keep looking for new gifts of brightness in solid and sure openings.

Excerpted from my motivational autobiography, Navigating Life’s Roadways: Stories of Insight from My Odyssey and Inspiration for Your Journey in print and Kindle eBook http://www.amazon.com/dp/B008FQDPYE

Be Tenacious! Ride the Trail of Life's Winds

Tough Times Never last, But Tough People Do!

Title of a book by Revered Robert H. Schuller

On a bike ride on top of a volcano in Maui, 2001

"Hold on!"

            As wild bicycle riders, my play gang during my youth and I would yell these words to each other as we circled the house—jumping ditches or mudholes, cruising over  rocks, knocking over playmates—or anything else in our way—peddling our ‘no speeds’ as hard as we could.  We were usually doubled up on the bike— one doing the leg work while standing— the other one perched on the seat, holding the other's waist, head, arms, or whatever provided the firmest grip. Occasionally, a third person would hop on, riding the handlebar or a rear wheel seat. Fierce and focused for big fun, we rode that limited but challenging route around the house on the bicycle, since we were not allowed to venture out into the road. Occasionally one of us would try to show off and take both hands off of the handlebars…and then everyone fell down. 

            I continued to enjoy biking and at one time lived close to an extensive and intermittently demanding trail in Alexandria VA. The trail’s proximity to the Potomac River brought beauty and peace to the ride for me. However, on windy days this location was particularly challenging. Headwinds coming off the river prevailed, slowing my ride and causing me to hold on tighter when I reached dangerous curves and downhills. I was concerned about falling because in spots the trail was further surrounded by miry marsh and rocky deep ditches. My helmet offered some protection and I shifted gears as necessary to negotiate the path. Those were not times or places for any tricks like riding with my hands off the handle bars. Paying attention to these moments, the call for me was to still ‘hold on’.

            The trails of life can yield weighty winds and stumbling stones, but being steadfast can help us to ride them out. ‘That which doesn’t kill us can make us stronger.’ Let’s maximize our motions. With our protections of faith, creativity and a firm foundation of focus— we can do it. 

            Another one of my favorite gospel songs tells me, ‘Just like a tree that's planted by the water, I shall not be moved.’

            Our talents provide a framework of protection for us to peddle hard on the journey.

Excerpted from my motivational autobiography, Navigating Life’s Roadways: Stories of Insight from My Odyssey and Inspiration for Your Journey in print and Kindle eBook http://www.amazon.com/dp/B008FQDPYE

Be Victorious! Find Your Village to Celebrate

 

If there is no struggle, there is no progress.

Frederick Douglass, Abolitionist

Celebrating victory at my first book signing in July 2011

 

            The paths we’ve trod tell our stories of triumph and we should tell them one by one, stride by stride. Whatever these stories are— no matter how big or small, they are ours.

             When I wrote my autobiography Navigating Life's Roadways, the anecdotes from my childhood and adult experiences reveal a plethora of  my struggles and successes. For instance, because I was raised in a house with no indoor bathroom or running water, it was certainly a glorious moment when I had a toilet inside the same place I lived. Now I even have a few. The flush is a win! My first job as a dishwasher at the cafe in my hometown of Waverly Virginia paid fifty cents an hour and now I make a little more than that! (Although between my schedule and the hours I keep being self-employed, there is no doubt there may be times when I still make fifty cents an hour!)

            At our family gatherings we laugh and reflect on the extremely difficult challenges of our past and revel in the at times not-as-difficult skirmishes of today. As the expression goes, “It’s all relative.” 

            Most of us can glance back and be in awe of the conquests made within our community of family and friends. Kids graduated. Promotions came. Cancer went into remission. Grandchildren finally arrived. Wrongly accused were exonerated. Churches were joined. Houses bought. Loans came through. Good jobs came along. Car started—again. Checks are in the mail. Opportunities are open. Laws passed. Times changed.

            I stop and rejoice in the overcoming—reaffirming the progress in our gathered and appointed places.

 

            We have earned the right to stand back and admire our fortitude. After all, finding the way forward requires much effort.

 

Excerpted from my motivational autobiography, Navigating Life’s Roadways: Stories of Insight from My Odyssey and Inspiration for Your Journey in print and Kindle eBook http://www.amazon.com/dp/B008FQDPYE