Friday, July 26, 2013

9 REMINDERS FOR FRESHMEN: About Life And the World

I starting putting college talk in my nephew’s head early on in his life. His journey started a bit tough, but as a doting and honest aunt, I could see he had potential.  So he did eventually graduate high school, taking control of his future. Below are the comments from a letter I wrote to him as he embarked on his first year in college. These words modeled the same advice that had been given me by my mother and other family as I began that sojourn into full adulthood; commencing! As we enter this season of parents sending their children off to first year of college, hopefully this list of ponderings is timely tested for readers to share with their freshmen.

1.   Talk to God daily. He “orders your steps.”  You know he has brought you out of many situations and you see the miracles he has done for you.  I can’t say enough of how proud I am of how you.

2.  Life requires work; not many things come about easily.  “If you take one step, God will take two.”   Have a plan for what you want to do while at school, your holiday breaks, and summers.

3.  Things won’t always happen the way you want them to and when you want them to. “God may not come when you want, but he’s always right on time.”  Don’t rush life.  Let things happen for you in their time.  Be your age!!  If you don’t, you wind up being bored because you’ve experienced “too much, too soon.”

4. Make decisions carefully and well thought out ones.  Get good accurate information from a variety of sources to help you determine what you want to do and how you want to be.  I know you’re hearing a lot of different things from other students and friends.  Hear it, but don’t believe everything you hear. Check out the real truth with facts. Be your own person with a solid understanding of your own opinions and perspectives.

5.  Life has its good times and bad times, fun times and boring times for everyone.  No situation or place is ever perfect.

6.  Flexibility and an open mind are important.  And it is ok to change your mind about things. However be aware of any consequences involved about those things you may change your mind about.  Particularly any negative consequences that involve finances, your reputation, or upset your future.

7.  Friendship is one of the greatest gifts of life.  So make friends based on trust, respect, and shared values. Those will last longer.  And I feel your friendships will be so important to you as you get older especially since you’re an only child, your friends may eventually become your family.

8.  Explore new hobbies and interests that have lifelong value as well as variety and can get you through the ups and downs of life whether you’re in good health or not, have money or not, have people to do things with or not.   Things I learned to do as a kid and while in college provide me with entertainment now.  I read when I can’t be outside, I bike when I want to enjoy the outdoors, like to play tennis and splash in the water, learning to play golf, enjoy talking to good friends on the phone, and as you know love to eat and enjoy dining out.

9. Remember, you are blessed, loved by God, family, and friends!!

Sunday, June 23, 2013

Saturday, May 25, 2013

Navigating! For Success in Life, Career and Business Pursuits: Memorial Day: Honoring The Ancestors of a Differen...

Navigating! For Success in Life, Career and Business Pursuits: Memorial Day: Honoring The Ancestors of a Differen...: “I would fight for my liberty so long as my strength lasted, and if the time came for me to go, the Lord would let them take me.” Harr...

Memorial Day: Honoring The Ancestors of a Different Battle

“I would fight for my liberty so long as my strength lasted, and if the time came for me to go, the Lord would let them take me.”
 
            My maternal grandfather, Joseph (Joe) Everett Parker, Sr., honored our history and this holiday in a different way.  On Memorial Day during the 1960s, the children of the family accompanied him on an ancestral voyage.  We went to the burial grounds of his parents and other relatives, some who were born slaves or in the reconstruction era. Here he honored their service. Because they had fought for racial freedom, persevering and sacrificing in the most horrid of conditions. I call them ‘old soldiers’ too, experienced on the battlefield of life.
            The grave sites were located way back off a rural road, some 15 miles or so from our home in Waverly Virginia.  In preparation for the trip my grandfather loaded up his tools to attend to the publicly neglected graves. At that time, black people could not be buried in our town’s cemetery. So most of the graves were located out in the "country" on traditional church grounds or old family sites. 
            As rather adventurous children who loved treats, we were excited about these outings with my grandfather for a couple of reasons. This was another chance to be away from home while enjoying the outside. And as part of this ritual my grandfather stopped at the local store and bought the makings for a good sandwich; bread, baloney, mayonnaise, and grape Nehi sodas—our favorite ‘poor folks’ snack.          
            Back then the significance of this cemetery ritual was lost on our young minds.  We watched my grandfather clear the weeds and wild growth from the place where his folks lay.  Delicately, he touched the mounds of dirt with his hoe or pitchfork, clearing the brush as he went about his task.  This was a sacred place. After the work was done, my grandfather bent his head.  He cried.  He prayed.  He paid homage to the souls of our kindred spirits.  In spite of his exhibits of strength and occasional “hell raising”, my grandfather was at times a very sentimental and emotional man. I value this understanding about my grandfather.
            Joe Parker’s sense of history and roots were firm and unknowingly he passed it down through the generations in a special way. I remember, this is an important part of our legacy. And I write about these unsung and enduring heroes whose acts of bravery in the enemy’s camp for humanity have made my progress so. They won!
 
Excerpted from my upcoming book, TOOLS TO CULTIVATE THE PROMISED LAND: Working Wisdom from My Grandparent’s Garden, October 2013
 
 
With my grandfather in 1982